Posted by: dominicanoutreach | July 1, 2009

Jesus Interviews for Pastor Position

Church Interviewer: Thank you for coming for this interview. I can’t help but notice you did not fill out an application and submit a profile. Could you explain?

Applicant: I have no need to commend myself. If you care to and dare to, talk to some people I know on the streetcorner, they will give a commendation that counts. I’ll submit their changed lives as my letter of application.

Interviewer: Thank you. We will take that into consideration. Your forthrightness is both refreshing and … um … disturbing… This is not our usual proceeding. Let me move on to my next question, about something we have heard that we find troubling should it indeed be true. We are told you have no home or need of a home. Is that true?

Applicant: Foxes have holes and birds have nests, I find a place to stay when I get somewhere for while I am there. Most places I’m just passing through though.

I: Well may I remind you we have a 4 bedroom home you could use should you get the position.

A: Great, I met few people on the walk over here that could use some shelter.

I: Moving to another area we usually talk about in such interviews, have you been made aware of the salary package we are offering?, and, if so, do you have any comments?

A: I have food to eat you know nothing about, that food is to do the will of him who sent me.

I: OK, I’ll assume from that the offer is more than satisfactory. Could you tell us about some of your past successes in churches? What kind of things stand out? Do you have growth numbers, that kind of thing?

A: Well, not really. I tend to upset religious groups. I go in, I do what the one who sent me wills and generally there is an uproar. Once they took me outside and tried to throw me off a cliff…



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